Dear Shirley:
Is it possible people can be too happy?
Sincerely,
Smiles.
Dear Smiles:
My first response was “No”. Then after some investigation I found that as humans whose moods do fluctuate and are influenced by circumstances we hardly ever stay the same—happy or sad, angry or glad. Sometimes we have control of what happens and sometimes we don’t. We do have the ability to control how we respond to situations. Anyone who doesn’t alter their mood and stays the same throughout all life experiences is not normal. The term used is maladaptive. As personalities and sometime characters – we need to be adaptable. If we do not adapt to change there can be problems.
Life circumstances bringing about a change in mood can be more positive or more negative. It all depends on how we perceive the situation and choose to respond to it. Typically, people prefer and get more satisfaction from feeling happy and being energetic than to be sad or depressed and feel tired.
Does it take more energy to be happy? Sonja Lyubomirsky, P.H.D winner of the 2002 Templeton Positive Psychology Prize has spent the last 20 years researching happiness. She reports that 50 percent of individual differences in happiness are governed by our genetics, 10 percent by life circumstances, and the remaining 40 percent by how we think and what we plan to do. She calls it “our intentional activities and strategies.”
I’ll use my Dad as an example. He is most always positive. No matter what I say he will turn it into a positive. When I was a kid I used to try to trick him into saying something negative. I finally gave up and realizing his positive attitude was rubbing off on me.
He told me that when he was in high school, back in the 1940’s, he took a speech class. He was assigned to and read the book Power of Positive Thinking by Napoleon Hill. He agreed with what he learned. He said he knew people who weren’t happy and he didn’t see the point, so he decided to make an effort to be happy. He went on to become a traveling salesman and used his positive perspective to make people feel good and be happy.
Through observation Dr. Lyubomirsky found that being happy requires effort. Genuinely happy people do not just sit around being content. They make things happen, they figure out new ways to look at things, work at controlling their thoughts and feelings, and put forth effort to achieve. You can program yourself to be positive. Being positive is a disciplined practice until it becomes automatic. My Dad made a concerted effort early on to practice being positive—now it comes naturally.
In a study, Dr. Lyubomirsky conducted; she found that subjects who were instructed to think about happy life events for eight minutes every day for three days felt increased life satisfaction up to four weeks longer than they had prior to the study. She suggests expressing gratitude toward others and taking time to reflect on happy moments will increase your happiness level.
Other research has suggested that there is a set point for happiness just like we have a set point for our comfortable weight. We can change our happiness set point, just like we can change the set point of our weight. It takes more than just a two week diet of positive thinking it requires a long term effort and commitment to make it stick. We basically have to commit to do it everyday for the rest of forever: Till it becomes a way of thinking and ultimately living.
Climate can affect our happiness quotient. Imagine that Girdwoodian’s. If you move to a sunnier climate at first you will get a boost in your happiness, but over time your average set point will adjust to it and you will return to your normal self. Although it is true that Seasonal Affect Disorder (SAD) research has shown that sunlight does make a significant positive increase in our mood.
“The How of Happiness: A Scientific Approach to Getting the Life You Want.” (Penguin Press, 2009) written by Dr. Lyubmirsky contains some interesting research findings from the effects of Happiness:
• Rich people aren’t as happy as expected. People who earn more than 10 million dollars annually report levels of personal happiness only slightly greater than office personnel or blue collar workers.
• Happy people make more money. College freshman who are reportedly happy tend to make higher salaries by their mid-thirties.
• Happy people think they are better looking than they are. Happy people rate themselves as more attractive than do their less happy peers.
• HUGS make people happier. A minimum of 5 hugs a day make you happier due to the release of the neurotransmitter Oxytocin [to be discussed in a later article and not to be confused with Oxycontin].
• As we get older we generally get happier. The peak is over the age of 65. Reminiscing on previous life experiences has positive benefits.
Happy smiles to you.
“Ask Shirley” questions can be focused on any topics involving sport psychology, competition, health, fitness, clinical questions, substance abuse, or personal issues. Please, email your questions to Askshirl@gmail.com. Your identity will remain anonymous.
Shirley K. Durtschi is a Certified Consultant in Applied Sport Psychology (CC-AASP), with a Ph.D. and M.S. in Sport Psychology, is a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC), and a Chemical Dependency Counselor II (CDCII) for the State of Alaska.